It’s Not Just About The Internet…

            August 2012    
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We’re Creating Apathetic Robots

By Allan J. Katz, M.S. CRC

The Orthodox Jewish world continues to seesaw back and forth about the pros and cons of the Gathering on Technology at Citified in New York, shown in communities around the world. Debates abound about the best filters, blocks and technological band aids which will surely repair the dangerous environmental influences of the outside world. Let’s ban or block the Internet and suddenly our children will be less distracted, our communities more friendly and our learning and praying more for the sake of Heaven instead of rote blabbering to get it over with.

In 1944, Rabbi Eliyahu Dessler said in Strive for Truth (v.3, p.143) “Human beings believe, in their arrogance that if they continue developing the world on the basis of ever expanding technology they will eventually achieve an environment that will afford everyone unlimited gratification of the senses and a life of ease and pleasure. So long as people remain "takers,” their efforts will inevitably be directed toward selfishness...

With the advance of technology and the ease of availability, the temptation of distraction has become a daily struggle for Jews across the spectrum to remain upright even in their own homes. But the Internet is only part of the problem. Go into almost any synagogue today and you’ll find congregants reading their emails on their cellphones and leaving praying to answer their phones, with their Talis over their heads and Tefillin perfectly squared. Attend any Torah lecture, graduation ceremony, wedding or bar mitzvah and you’ll find people texting instead of being present. The real problem is chutzpah and selfishness and parents are teaching it to their children by their own actions, then wondering… what went wrong!!!

Rabbi Bachya says in Duties of the Heart: "Their evil inclination induces them to abandon the spiritual world wherein lies their salvation… it makes self-adornment more attractive to them… it impels them to gratify their desires for self-indulgence… until they are sunk in the depths of its seas."

In the rush to satisfy our thirst for instant gratification, information and acceptance, we’ve created a Jewish society devoid of cohesiveness and spirituality, full of chutzpah and apathy. As Rabbi Dessler said 68 years ago, “They persist in thinking that soon, very soon, they will hit the right formula, and if not in this generation, then in the next, universal happiness will come. And so they bring up their children to study nothing and think of nothing but technological advancement…” (Strive for Truth, v.3, pg. 152).

It seems as if children and adults 68 years ago were also steeped in the excesses of technology, though it is not as insidious as today. Unfortunately, Jews today are becoming apathetic robots. In their quest to look very religious with their starched white shirts and impeccable back hats; in keeping up with the Schwartz’s, they have truly collapsed into a materialistic society, all for the sake of Heaven.

Consider the case of Yaakov who goes to the store to buy a pair of expensive shoes on sale at a national chain department store, known for its lenient return policy. There he meets his friend Shimon who has just bought the exact pair of shoes that Yaakov wants. Shimon relates to Yaakov that he “purchased” the $300 pair of shoes for only $200 by switching the price tag while no one was looking and Yaakov can have them for $250, thereby saving $50 and Shimon will make some money on the deal. Shimon is very proud of himself and Yaakov gets a great deal. Where I come from this is called stealing.

Or consider the practice of Reuven going to an outlet store to buy fancy white shirts for Shabbos, to sit and learn in one of America’s finest Yeshivos, where he wouldn’t dare stand out wearing a blue shirt. Lo and behold, Reuven ends up at the local Nordstrom return counter telling the clerk the shirt is imperfect and he wants to exchange the shirt or get a refund.

Why would religious people, steeped in Torah learning, resort to lying and stealing?

The Orchos Tzaddikim in Sh'ar Hasheker says, “Alchemists turn copper into gold where even the experts cannot tell the difference. So it is with the mind of the charlatan. He rationalizes and justifies his lies until they appear even to him as truth.” Alan Morinis in Every Day, Holy Day says, “What could possibly cause you to vary from the truth? Probe your motivations and you will encounter some other trait like envy or laziness - seeking its own satisfaction. You deviate from the truth when some inner trait wants to bend reality to its own purpose" (p. 344).

As you see, envy fueled by chutzpah and engineered by selfish materialism causes people to steal and lie, all for the sake of Heaven; so they can join the “in-crowd” and look like everyone else with fancy shoes, exquisite hats and starchy, imperfect white shirts.

Not surprisingly, the men and women that Rachel Shteir, author of “The Steal: A Cultural History of Shoplifting, spoke to also talked differently about shoplifting. The men sounded as if they saw themselves as heroes in video games; one described the excitement of racing through the aisles of Target, outwitting the sales staff, security people and cameras. People want to self-enhance and feel good about themselves. People want to be seen in a respectable light by their friends. When this can be accomplished without deception, people are usually honest.

Yes, the Internet and hand held technology are to blame for seriously deteriorating the holiness of Jewish society forever, destroying relationships and distracting us from what is truly our purpose in life, to serve G-d by doing HIS mitzvot. Even secular psychologists, who once were technology advocates, are now decrying the lack of one-to-one communication and the compulsion to check our hand held devices in spite of danger, social awkwardness and rudeness. Fortunately there are more mitzvot besides guarding your eyes. Number eight is “thou shall not steal” and number nine is “thou shall not lie.”

What is the answer? Another type of filter. We cannot expect people to live in caves and never have access to the outside world. Our computers need filters desperately but what’s next, putting filters on women’s heads so men will no longer be tempted to look in the street? No.

The answer is to filter our own minds and heads by becoming role models for our children in synagogue, at home and in business. By dressing properly ourselves, by understanding that being holy is about respecting ourselves enough to feel good about our own personal strengths, instead of looking outside ourselves for validation, the latest styles, gossip and news.

The answer is bringing up our children to understand that they have a G-d given soul and direct them to understand their strengths instead of teaching them what they do will lead them straight into hell. To teach our children from a very young age about G-d, faith, trust and the privilege of being G-d’s chosen people, not a nation that has to rely on the whims, customs and fads of others to feel good about ourselves. This is truly the test of our generation but we’re too busy churning out apathetic robots who could care less.

Allan Katz, M.S. has a Masters Degree in Rehabilitation Counseling, working toward licensure and his certification as a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist with the International Institute of Trauma and Addiction Professionals. He is the author of Mask in the Mirror, a motivational book for healing from sexual compulsivity. ( For the past 4 years he has been the moderator of the U.S. hotline for religious Jews suffering from sexual compulsivity and Internet addiction as well as a phone group leader with Guard Your He delivers lectures and workshops nationwide to schools, synagogues and organizations who want to spread awareness and protect their members from this epidemic which is destroying the moral fabric of our people. He can be reached at or at 901-359-8299.


from the August 2012 Edition of the Jewish Magazine

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